The 11-day plan to lose 14 pounds
The absolute worst weight loss plan ever!
Day 1: Get tonsils out at age 35. Sleep most of the day. Remain in hospital
Day 2: Pain, no food. LOTS more sleeping
Day 3: Better drugs, less pain, no food. Return home from hospital. Feast on liquid yogurt (4 oz) and about the same amount of apple juice. A nice 7 hour nap in the afternoon for refreshment is advised.
Day 4: No food. Lots of water. A little bit of juice. LOTS of drugs. Try to limit napping to under 6 hours.
Day 5: Some ice cream. Did I mention LOTS OF WATER and pain killers? Napping + sleep should take 18 hours out of an otherwise busy day.
Day 6: Oatmeal (1 packet) for breakfast. Mac-n-cheese (1 packet Easy mac) for lunch. 1 shake for dinner. Light 3 hour nap.
Day 7: No food. Too sore from overdoing it the previous day. Lots of water and pain killers instead. Don’t bother getting out of bed.
Day 8: I feel fantastic. I think I’ll feast on….painkillers. And some apple juice. Add a 5 1/2 hour nap and we’re good to go.
Day 9: Hmm…I think I’ll start the day with a nap on the couch. Then a shake in the afternoon followed by a nap on another couch. This will be followed by a nap in the easy chair by the fireplace.
Day 10: Doctor checkup! Doctor looks at your throat and says “Wow, I’m glad that’s not me. But it looks normal. Have you tried napping?”. Return home. Painkillers for lunch, 6 hour nap to follow.
Day 11. 1 scrambled egg for breakfast after weighing myself. You gotta eat after all. I’m getting a bit tired….perhaps a short nap is in order.
I have read numerous similar threads about the agony of UPPP surgery recovery. Maybe I was lucky, maybe I can just tolerate more pain. I do know that what I can’t tolerate is lying in bed. It simply goes against my grain.
I had the same surgery two weeks ago (15 days) and I was out of the hospital 5 hours after the procedure began. I missed 1 1/2 days of work, and didn’t need anywhere near all of the pain meds they prescribed. I’m a 46-year-old male and while the pain was pretty bad for a couple of days, it certainly wasn’t debilitating.
I lost about 6 lbs. due to not being able to eat solid food for a few days. By day 5, I could tolerate most things except tomato products and citrus.
I read where one doctor said that they advise their patients to prepare to miss two weeks of work. Ridiculous, unless you’re jon involves very heavy lifting. This past weekend I carried 100 lbs. of sand per trip to the kid’s sandbox.
I know everyone’s different and tolerates surgeries differently, but I also suspect some people (not the blogger) use this as an excuse to lie around in a drug-induced haze for a couple of weeks.
Your pain tolerance must be a little higher than mine. However, I do know that pain from the same surgery can vary drastically. I had right and left hernia surgeries two years apart. The first one was extremely painful. The second was virtually pain free.
As far as the exertion – I had the deviated septum repair at the same time. You can’t really do anything that raises your blood pressure for a couple of weeks or you bleed like crazy.